Dear Psychosis, Gaslighting

 

     Dear Psychosis, Gaslighting

gas·light
/ˈɡasˌlīt/
verb
gerund or present participle: to manipulate (someone) using psychological methods into questioning their own sanity or powers of reasoning.

Have you ever heard any of these phases:

"I did that because I was trying to help you."

"That's not what happened."

"You're crazy."

"This is why you don't have friends."

"This is your own fault."

"That is hardly important."

"That's not what I meant."

If you have, then you know what it's like to be gaslighted. I already struggle daily with questioning my reality vs. nonreality. I really don't need any more help with that. It's harmful to the psyche to be around people who give you this kind of verbal abuse. It makes you feel like you will never be good enough. I have a friend who finally got out of a long marriage. He would say things to her like "Your family won't want you back," "you have nothing and nowhere to go," "I did that because you made me angry." She felt stuck and alone like she couldn't get out. The truth is she could have left at any time. She had resource and a family that loves her very much. They would do absolutely anything for her. She had friends that would take her in and make sure she was taken care of. He twisted her thinking so badly that she didn't feel like she had any other options. 

There are always options. 

Never let anyone tell you that you're less than what you are! You are loved and wanted! The thoughts you think and the things you feel are valid. It's ok to talk about your feelings. If you ever feel like you don't have anyone to talk to there are therapist out there who would love to lend an ear and help work through some things with you. Therapists can be a tool not only when you are in crisis, but when you are doing great and everything is fine. There are hotlines such as The Suicide Hotline or places to call and report abuse in your community, so you don't have to do anything alone.

You never have to be alone. 

Dear Psychosis, Everybody needs that Friend

 Dear Psychosis,

Everybody needs that Friend

I feel like it's important to stop and talk about how important it is to have friends. People we can laugh, cry, share and just be silent with. I know my brain has times when it wants to be left alone, but more often than not, it needs someone to come in and show their support. We don't have to use words. We don't even have to look at each other. The bond between best friends goes beyond all of that. A true friend is someone who shows up when you are at your lowest low and your highest high! Have you ever been so close to someone you can get that certain look and know what they are thinking? I certainly have and it feels so good to be connected on that level! 

Sometimes I just need to laugh and then laugh some more. Friends are so good for that. It's like a breath of fresh air! Kevin Hart says "laughter heals all wounds, and that's one thing that everybody shares. No matter what you're going through, it makes you forget about your problems. I think the world should keep laughing." I could not agree more! Laughter is the best medicine as I have heard so many people say. Laughing with friends, creating inside jokes, relishing that pure, simple joy.

Have you ever been around someone who doesn't really have many friends? They can seem kind of sad, almost stuck in their minutia, just trying to get through their week so they can do more mundane things during the weekend. They don't really smile and normally have nothing to talk about. I do know there are people who prefer to be alone, but I imagine that can get lonely at times. I don't know what I would do without my friends cheering me on in my times of weakness, happiness, and anger. I need my hype people, but I also love being the hype person as well. Nothing feels better than being kind and encourage a friend when they need it! Mental health can just straight up suck at times. I need my people! You know who you are and I appreciate every single one of you! If I ever wrote my blessings down all of those name's would be on top!